Archive for the ‘Bad Phone Sex’ Category

Now I ask you just how hard is it to suck a mans dick? Apparently for some of these so called phone sluts it’s a hard concept for them to wrap there minds around much less there mouths. I mean fucking hell if your going to work as a phone sex operator at least take the time to learn the basics. If you’ve never sucked a cock, then for fuck sake go out and buy a carrot or banana and suck on that to get a feel for it. Don’t just sit there and moan, throw in a gag every now and then and think that’s a blow job.
I made the mistake of calling this bitch Sara, she had nice full lips, looked good for some sucking action, but damn was I disappointed. This dumb whore may have had lips that looked like they could pleasure a dick, but the dull twit they were attached to hadn’t a clue how to use them on a mans cock or anything else for that matter unless one can say talking out your ass is a talent. Not even closing my eyes and trying to tune her out cold get my boner back so finally had to say to hell with this waste of time and money call.
I’m going to have to try this again later tonight and will keep you updated on the results. I’ve found a sexy slut after my bad call and plan on giving this phone whore a try. After all I still need to have my cock sucked and surely I won’t come across two bad bitches in one night. So here’s hoping that Kelly will know how to use that sweet mouth and tongue to suck my dick dry.

I know what you’re thinking; what the hell does he mean by phone sex lottery. Well I will tell you; every time we pick of the phone to call some phone sex operator we are taking a gamble that she will be worth our time and the money we spend on the call. Some times we get a good one and hit the jackpot or should I say lottery and some times we end up wasting money and time on something that brings us no satisfaction.
That’s just what I did tonight; I took a chance and called this hot slut Meryl thinking that damn anything that looked that hot had to be good in bed, well I was wrong. This dumb whore I am sure in real life is what one would call a dead fuck. She had no imagination, her voice was dull and lifeless, she didn’t show the least bit of interest in pleasing me the customer, hell I even think she was yawning during the call. After the second yawn I gave up and ended the call. I mean enough is enough and I think she got enough money for doing nothing and hell now the slut can go to bed and stop yawning her head off.
Still in the mood to get my dick off before heading to bed I decided to call one more girl. I found this hot little red head Molly, perky tits, nice round ass, and a body that just screams fuck me, so I said what the hell and gave her a call. All I can say is Molly didn’t disappoint, her voice dripped sex appeal, and she was most eager to do what ever I asked of her and not one single yawn. She climbed right up on to my lap and took every hard inch of my hard cock into her sweet pussy and gave one hell of a ride! So make note; one more good phone whore out there for those of us in the need of a little pleasure.

Yes that’s right I said it, and I know any of you reading my blog will agree it’s pretty damn hard to find a phone sex operator these days that knows what’s she doing or cares to make the customer happy. I called this bitch Angelica today because her ad looked like she was hot and from what she had written in her ad she was suppose to know how to please a man. Well sad to say she didn’t have a clue.
Don’t get me wrong she had a nice enough voice, but I can tell she really wasn’t into the call. A dead give away was the fact that I could hear her TV going load and clear and there were long moments of silence where I could tell she was watching the damn TV and not listening to me, the one that was paying her. I would tell her I wanted her to suck my dick, and nothing, then she would mumble what’s your fantasy baby as if she never heard a word I said which proves she didn’t. I finally just ended the call, fuck if I was going to sit there getting charged per minute for bad phone sex.
Not ready to give up I decided to look at some of the sexy sluts I had booked marked and found one named Kim that seemed to fit the bill. I gave Kim a call, told her I wanted her to suck my cock, and I am happy to say she sucked my dick like a pro. I could just feel her lips around my hard shaft sucking my cock with her warm mouth then drinking down every drop of my hot cum. Yes I would have to say I will be giving this phone whore another call when my dick is in the mood to play.

Hell yes I would love to talk to a good phone sex whore instead of the dumb slut I had the misfortune of talking to today. It would seem that Jada doesn’t have a clue how to satisfy a man on the phone and I doubt she knows what to do with a dick in real life either for that matter.
I thought this girl was hot from the picture in her ad, naturally one would think a woman has a sexy body; she’s bound to know how to please a man. Well sad to say I found out the hard way that’s not always the case. All this so called phone sex whore new how to do was giggle. Seems suddenly I am the funniest man on earth and every word out of my mouth is just the most comical things this twit has ever heard. I say cock she laughs, I say slide my dick into her pussy she laughs, not sure about any of you but I’m not really into laughter while I’m trying to get my dick off. After a few minutes of this bullshit I told her I had spent enough time and money on her lazy ass and ended the call.
Not willing to give up and my cock still in the mood for some fun I decided to call this hot chick named Clair. This phone slut new what she was doing. No giggling just followed my lead and played out my fantasy. With this hot chick I was able to close my eyes and feel her pussy lips squeeze my cock as I slid into her warm hole. I’m happy to say I gave her cunt one hell of a pounding and left her with hot cum dripping out of her well used pussy.

There’s nothing like a good phone sex call, just too bad of late most of mine suck. I’m telling you I may sound like I complain to much but hell if I’m going to spend my hard earned money calling some phone slut I expect to get what I’m paying for. Seriously how do some of these girls even get a job working in phone sex? The one I talked to today I can only imagine she’s never had a climax in her life. The only way I can picture Ellen is lying there, not moving, not feeling a damn thing and every now and then throwing out a moan to make her lover feel like he’s getting it right. Hell I don’t even think a vibrator would get this bitch off. I truly thing her pussy is dead.
Just to show you I’m not getting carried away here or just pissed about another bad call, I will fill you in on my lovely call with this fucking lack luster whore Sherry. I call her up wanting to fuck her doggy style, and before I’m even in her pussy she starts moaning and screaming she’s going to cum. I mean what the fuck? Dumb slut could at least wait till I’m in her before she fakes her orgasm. You would think since I’m pay per minute that she would like to at least give a half ass effort to keeping me on the line, after all isn’t that why she’s taking calls to make money?
At any rate I lost my mood real fast with that twit, hung up to save myself a few bucks on a bad phone call. I’ll admit it I was good and pissed, sat there for a good 30 minutes cussing that stupid whore before I was able to get myself in the mood to play again. Decided to give this sexy babe Ashton a call, and happy days this one new to wait till I was inside her before she showed any type of reaction to my cock. None of that fake moaning over and over, this bitch new how to work a mans cock with her tight hole, and if I do say so myself she took a good hard pounding, and let me listen as she slide her fingers in her pussy to lick my cream.

That’s right; my dick was one happy camper, standing at attention, ready to play till I called Beth the suck as phone sex whore. Let me just say Beth didn’t seem very interested in playing with my cock nor making him happy. As a matter of fact she kind of scared the hell out of my dick with the way she kept screaming she was going to bite my pecker. I didn’t want my Willy bit, and to be honest if she was that damn hungry I think a trip to KFC would have been better then trying to chew on my cock!
I’m not kidding here this bitch really didn’t pay the least bit of attention to what my fantasy was. I wanted her to suck my balls, run her tongue up my shaft, then take my huge dick into her mouth for some nice sucking action, not try to eat my dick! Screaming at me give me that dick, I want to bite it hard, I want to hurt you, fucking hell is it any wonder she scared my poor cock? I’m not sure if I will have any fun with my poor pecker for at least a good hour now after that evil bitch scared the hell out of it.
Just a note here for all of you phone sex sluts; most men don’t want there dicks bitten off. Learn to listen to what the customer wants for fuck sake, sure if he’s into that then hell yes go for it, but damn don’t try to bite my dick off if I’m not into torture. I would much rather a woman be gentle with my cock then try to eat it for dinner. If you that damn hungry then by all means grab a bite to eat before you start taking calls. Noting worse then scaring a mans dick, spoils the rest of the night since it won’t come out to play.

Nothing pisses me off more then to be in the mood for a good phone sex call and get some stupid bitch that doesn’t know or care how to pleasure a man. Called this slut Juliette today and one word sums her up; dead fuck. This bitch can’t get many dates or should I say after the first date I doubt they ask her out again. She had one of the dullest voices I’ve heard in all my years of calling phone sex lines. Shit I’ve heard more enthusiasm for the lady at Jack in The Box taking my order in the drive through then this bitch.
I mean it’s not like I’m asking for the world here. She had some nice big boobs and I was in the mood for tit fuck. You wouldn’t think that was asking too much now would you? Sad to say this whore may have had to breast but she sure didn’t have the imagination it took to get a man off. After just a few minutes on the phone with her my poor dick was soft and not in the mood. To show you what I mean, this is pretty much how my call went. Oh baby, yes slide you big hard cock between my breast, yes baby, fuck my tits, oooh that feels so good then a lot of fake moaning. The whole fucking call was dull and fake.
Needless to say I didn’t cum between Juliette’s fine tits, but on the up side I did find this hot slut Emma that new just how to use her big boobs to fuck a mans cock. Have to say she gave one hell of a fine tit fuck, my dick was very happy and I shot my hot cum between to lovely mounds and she was kind enough to lick my sticky goo off those hot breast.

Sorry just in a really bad mood tonight. Just sitting here after calling this bitch April and wonder how in the fuck someone like that could ever get hired to be a phone sex operator. I mean do they even bother to check and see if these hoes even know what sex is much less how to do it before they hire one? April may look hot as hell, but her talent for leading a man through his fantasy is what one would call; none. She reminded me of some twit when on a long drive that is dumb enough to keep asking, are we there yet. No bitch were not there yet and doesn’t look like my cock is going to get anything out of this call.
On and on she went, oh baby this and oh baby that, I really just wanted to reach through the phone and slap the shit out of her to be honest. Talk about getting on my last nerve. I’m a customer, not her baby, not her sweet heart, I want one thing when I call a phone hoe, and that is to make my cock hard, make me feel good, and make me shoot my load. Now I ask is that to much to ask? After all it is called phone sex, so it should be a given to these stupid whores that we want sex, not oooh baby. Fucking hell oooh baby does nothing for my dick, but thinking about pussy lips wrapped tight around my cock does a whole hell of lot to get me turned on and ready to go.
So to all you lack luster phone sluts out there, please make notes, hell if you must go read a book on sex, look at some pictures of what people do when they fuck, so maybe next time someone calls, you might have a clue how to suck that dick, ride that cock, or even play with your pussy.